I got into work today and there sitting on the counter, was an envelope. A slightly lumpy envelope.
I know, I know. You’ve heard this story before, right?
This time it wasn’t a Hotel V envelope, but rather a card-shaped envelope, and was suspiciously bulky. On the back it read “Happy Birthday Anne!”
Hmpf, I thought. Happy Birthday Anne indeed.
I sniffed and sniffed, but could only smell a pleasant vanilla aroma. Whoever left this to be mailed was pretty good, they had most bases covered.
Still, my colleague and I were convinced that something illegal was about to occur, so we gently lifted the corner of the flap and peeked inside. We could see tinfoil. Who sends tinfoil in a birthday card?
So we opened it.
Sure enough, more drugs. They were wrapped in tin foil, sprayed to death with perfume, and put into a blank card.
For a second, I had a moment of hesitation. “Do we really care if this is posted?” I asked my coworker. “I mean, it’s not wrapped in Hotel V stationary in a Hotel V envelope this time. The hotel won’t get in trouble, so really who cares if we send it?” And honestly, I don’t care if these people get away with it. Props to them and all, yay for drugs, More Power to the Smokers, etc, etc.
But then I thought that if these people were smart enough to get the stamp off of us and go across the street to that big red postbox that you can see from where I am currently sitting and mail their drugs themselves, well then I would have no way of interfering and maybe all of their hardwork would pay off. But as it stands, they continue to give the drugs to the reception desk to mail, so I will continue to play vigilante and intervene.
Because I can, and it’s funny.
This time, I wrote a message in the blank card before I sealed it back up sans drugs and mailed it:
Ha! Ha! Gotcha! (posting drugs abroad is illegal!)
Love, the Dutch postal service.
And now here is me with twice the drugs, and still not a drug-smoker. Thanks, tourists!
I’m sure more of this is to be continued….
I’d love to see their face when they open the card.
Why won’t they just walk across the street? Enjoy your find!
You need to get a job with the post office (as a postal inspector). You could be a government worker!
[...] Happy Birthday, Anne! Ya got NOTHING! [...]
Hahahaa! I read this story aloud to my husband and we both laughed uproariously. I can’t believe people are dumb enough to even try that!
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